Here I am, entering my 20th Christmas, and I find myself thinking about the time that has passed. The fact that I am here and in good health to celebrate another holiday season is impressive. This time of year is so nostalgic for me, and I think it is for most people as well.
20. Two ten spots. The big two-zero. That is the number of times I have awaken on Christmas morning surrounded by the ones I love. The number of times I've noticed my mom's face light up at the sight of me enjoying a new gift. Unfortunately, as I get older, I find it more difficult to stay in that jacked-up Xmas frame of mind for 25 days. I don't catch a high off the thought of Santa Claus coming like five-year-old Shawn did, and that's okay. Well...it is and it isn't.
I don't think I was ever more grateful than when I was a kid. If I received a present, I was always happy with it. When I got to see my extended family, I always got excited. Now it seems as if when I get a gift I need to be able to use it somehow. It needs to be something I wanted; no more surprises. Also when family gathers, I have fun and love seeing them, but I lack genuine excitement. All of these childhood emotions that I've shed along the way were pivotal to the essential enjoyment of the holiday. Five-year-old Shawn would probably take a swing at me to be honest.
Am I telling you to be grateful? Or to be more grateful? Maybe. It's up to your own interpretation. Even if you're not Catholic, Christmas can be a nice holiday for anyone no matter who/what you worship. And all this bullshit about Christmas being a commercial holiday is terrible. It just makes everyone more cynical. You don't need gifts or things or material goods. It's a decent, human gesture to give something to your fellow man/woman. So, when you're celebrating this holiday, give an extra gift. Pour an extra drink for a friend (free of charge). Look out you're window Christmas Eve like the old days. Be happy with what you receive, but be happier with what you already have. And don't forget the intangible gifts all around you. The love, trust, joy, embarrassment, comfort, confusion, and serenity. You can't throw those away. You can't return those for store credit.
Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Enjoy this holiday to the fullest so you don't have to worry about a younger self kicking your ass.
